Premium: How Do I Handle Rejection When it Feels So Bad?

Image by Ulrike Leone

Q. Lately I’ve been having depressing thoughts caused by me and my girlfriend splitting up (she dumped me!). We had such a good thing and I just can’t seem to pull myself out of my gloomy state. She’s now got someone else and it drives me insane with jealousy, it really hurts. Another thing that hurts is I’ve been dumped twice this year now. This has destroyed my confidence as both girls went on about how ‘nice’ I am, but still dumped me. 

A. I am sorry to hear how you feel because life is such a precious thing which we have to try to enjoy every single day. It is all we have, not a rehearsal for another life, and you do sound miserable. But you are not alone in your feelings. Many people find it difficult to deal with rejection. They think so low of ourselves, they put their whole life in the hands of one person to get ‘happiness’, and when that is withdrawn, the pain of losing it is too much to bear. However, let’s start with some brutal truths, as I cannot help you with pretence. 

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