power | Lessons in Life Blog

Personally, I think most of us don’t fully understand the true power and impact that words have on us, otherwise we might be more wary of what we say!

Language defines us, reveals us and demonstrates our routine priorities. For example, the word ‘bored’ never comes into my vocabulary because I simply have too much to do to have time for that. Thus anyone using that word is saying a lot about how they FEEL about their time, and the inability to engage their talents to productive use. That also applies to any other word.

The words we use are also not accidental. We CHOOSE the words we feel most comfortable with according to our culture, treatment, identity, awareness, relevance, education and aspirations. For example, if we find it easier to use negative words than positive ones, they point to low self-belief, lack of confidence in ourselves, and a feeling of impotence.

Importantly, words come out of thoughts, so we cannot avoid certain words until we change our mindset and thought processes. Changing how we think also changes our perceptions and enable different words to come to the fore. However, as words reflect our beliefs about ourselves, changing them is not an easy thing to do until those beliefs are changed, too.

Our words are the most accurate indication of who we are and our true values, and have strong impact on our existence. That is why when people use certain derogatory words, and then deny them with defensive explanations like: “That’s not really me”, they are not being truthful. Those words would represent who they are, and the fears and prejudices they hold. As their circle or society might not condone what they say, it loses them friends, face and credibility, which prompts them to retract. However, we seldom use words we are not comfortable with, unless we are brainwashed by others.

Words are the only tools we have to indicate how others perceive us, and value us. Hence their impact, when used positively, or without empathy, can have a effect very powerful on others

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It’s called POWER. This is how such people make themselves feel significant, in control of others, and that they matter.

There are some people who lack self-belief and self esteem and, like bullies, the only way they can feel good about themselves is to make life harder for others, especially picking on those who might be more vulnerable and lacking in courage or confidence. They are often easy prey to that kind of selfish action.

Some people tend to have a belief that if they are not getting what they want, nobody should get theirs, either, hence why they spend their time making life difficult for others by thwarting their opportunities and success. However, you also have a choice as to whether someone can affect you, or not, because bullies will only prey on those they believe are weak and helpless. Perhaps you need to stand up for yourself and show them that you are not there to be manipulated or be made miserable; that they are not important to your progress in life.

As that great American First Lady, Eleanor Roosevelt, once said: “No one can make us feel inferior without our permission.” Indeed.

So you might need to let go of the victim mode and develop more confidence in yourself to ignore the negative actions of others by surrounding yourself with people who uplift you, instead of dragging you down. You really can tell the quality of your life, and what you desire for yourself, by the friends you keep.