The Fitness Booster: Is There Such a Thing as ‘The Truth’? See NEW Motivational Tips on Boosting Wellbeing!

Posted on 08/11/2022 by mscyprah

Do you tend to feel shy, afraid, and anxious? Sometimes life can feel overwhelming, especially when you have disappointments, or things are not going as expected.

• Are you feeling some frustration with life just now?

• Always finding fault with yourself, with what you say, and your actions?

• Is there something you would love to do but feel afraid of doing it, because you fear failure and messing it up, which is more overwhelming than the possible gains?

TAKE A LOOK AT THIS WEEK’S TOPICS

Does Confidence Come From Growing Into My Desired Self, or Being Comfortable With Who I Am?

I Really Don’t Want to Work. Is That Normal?

Personal Dilemmas: What would you do?

Do People Take Advantage of You Because You Cannot Say ‘NO’?

I Lost My Job And Don’t Seem to Have Any Direction Now

When It Comes To Beliefs, Is There Such A Thing As ‘The Truth’?

If you don’t feel confident about yourself, achieving your dreams or having great relationships, and could do with a boost in your self-esteem, The Fitness Booster Newsletter is just for you! It complements this blog, and covers a wide range of mental health and emotional health issues, giving useful tips on what to say in tricky circumstances and how to execute routine actions in a confident, winning way.

SUBSCRIBE FREE TODAY on Substack for regular posts and podcasts on improving your self-assurance and feeling more worthy and competent in your activities.

Poll #3: What Keeps You Feeling Anxious?

Posted on 15/08/2022 by mscyprah

Should an Employee be Fired Who Always Finishes the Work First Then Dozes at His Desk?

Posted on 14/08/2022 by mscyprah

Definitely not. That person is obviously not being stimulated enough physically or intellectually and clearly needs to be either given more tasks, along the same lines, or pushed up a level to train for something else that will be more challenging for him.

The problem with too many workplaces is that they expect everyone to be sheep, going at exactly the same pace, and doing everything in a prescribed manner. There is little room for initiative, innovation, or difference under the stifling culture of conformity. In this type of atmosphere, it is often difficult for mavericks, or people with different ideas and perceptions, to thrive.

Yet workers are not clones of each other. Just because they are in a team does not mean they should all go at exactly the same pace in their work like robots or automatons. This guy is clearly bored, having finished his work, and so does the next best thing to relieve it – take a nap to escape the tedium of his day. The important thing is that he has done his work, exactly as expected, and is giving a huge message about his abilities and expectations by then switching off into his own world. He is pointedly making a statement that if his ability is not going to be recognised, he’s going to do what is directed, and nothing else.

Some people might have asked for more tasks, but he deliberately hasn’t done so as he wants his abilities to be acknowledged and reinforced. There are tons of workers like that who know they can manage more challenging tasks, or new responsibilities, but are not given the opportunities to do so, for whatever reason, and who are essentially voting with their feet. They might be there in body, but any real commitment to what they doing would be missing.

A good manager or team leader DEVELOPS his/her staff so that they are working to their potential and can feel good about their own contribution. A leader does not fire workers who are clearly doing their job and are bored witless with not being challenged or stimulated enough in what they are being assigned. Time to see what would motivate this worker to stop him sleeping by reviewing his progress as necessary and negotiating a new way forward where he can feel valued, occupied and proud of his efforts,

This worker needs to be set regular targets which become more challenging after every completion. In that way he won’t have time to be dozing, and you would also be doing your job as a manager in making the most of his talent, enthusiasm and skills, at his own pace, and increasing his opportunities to grow.

How Do You Coach Someone to Reduce Their Level of Procrastination?

Posted on 14/08/2022 by mscyprah

This is not such an easy task as the procrastinator will always find a handy excuse for their delays. However, you need to start off with the REASONS behind the need to procrastinate. Remedying a particular situation is not really possible until we UNDERSTAND why we do certain things, and how we can alter our mindset and perspective to change those habits.

Procrastination is a sign of unease and temporary discomfort; of the inability to focus on priorities and react to the moment. It suggests something not quite right with what is happening at that time, which encourages the person to take refuge in delays and hesitation.

For example, when we procrastinate, we do it primarily for the following reasons:

We don’t really want to do a task (perhaps it’s very boring, especially if it is repetitive), so there is nothing to look forward to, and we dread having to do it again. Or we put it off for as long as possible so that we don’t have to do it at all in the end.
We don’t like doing the task, which gives us little satisfaction, thrill or excitement. It then induces fear or dread instead of any joy or positivity in doing it.
We are not ready, not qualified, or equipped for it, or we are not sure what we should do with it, so we feel overwhelmed by the thought of getting on with that job, and so delay the start as long as possible.
We are pre-occupied with anxiety around emotional/social/relationship issues that are unresolved and find it difficult to focus. Unless we resolve those issues, we will be distracted by them, which prevents us getting on with things we need to do.
We are pre-occupied with other tasks we believe should be done as well, while avoiding the need to get on with the task at hand.

The most important fact is that when we procrastinate, we are not making any decision to get anything done. Yet without that decision, we won’t have any action, which then gives us no RESULTS. Without routine results to reinforce our talents and competence, and reward our efforts, we won’t feel good about ourselves, or be motivated to do even more with our life. Soon it will gradually start having a knock-on effect on anything we might wish to do.

You would need to look at the reasons above, or to any other pertinent reason, to identify the ones the person might not be aware of, and try to resolve those first in order to motivate then into getting on with what is necessary. It could simply mean that the person is overwhelmed by what they have to do, and feels better procrastinating with the task rather than admitting what the real problem is. Hence why some soul-searching at the very beginning of coaching is extremely important to get to the bottom of their inactivity.

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LISTEN FREE: Podcast of The Day – Manager Favourite!

Posted on 11/08/2022 by mscyprah

What kind of leader do you strive to be? One that is liked and approved by everyone, or one that is keen on doing a job that is perceived well? Do you prefer to be a friend tosomeone, or a colleague to all?

This podcast explains the difference.

IF YOU FOUND THIS EPISODE USEFUL….SUBSCRIBE to Lessons in Life podcast on Anchor for more topics that could be of value to your situation or dilemma.

Follow Elaine on Twitter @ESiheraESC for new podcast alerts.

At What Ideal Age Should You Retire?

Posted on 09/08/2022 by mscyprah

Retirement is one of those times that some people dread, or actually welcome, depending on their job satisfaction, the state of their emotional and physical health, financial circumstances, and desire for new challenges. In the UK the official retirement age used to be 60 years old for women and 65 years for men. But that is gradually increasing to take account of the growing longevity within the population, and the increasing demands on health care. Retirement now stands at 66 years old for everyone, and at some point will reach 70 years.

Of course, that is the legal time for the benefit of paying pensions, but anyone can retire from their work whenever they wish. There is no ‘ideal age’ to retire at all. In fact, one of the people who has inspired me the most is the owner of a vineyard in France who was still managing her business successfully at 92 years of age! She was a classic example of her determination to live her life the way she wanted, and not according to other people’s fears and diktats. I can see myself being like that if I live long enough to be her age!

As humans, who fear ageing, we love to put ourselves into little age boxes of perfection where different things occur at different ages, especially when it comes to retirement, because work dominates our lives so much. But life is for living every single day we are granted, and the moment you actually retire is entirely down to you! No one can tell you when is a suitable age for your retirement because that depends on five things, in particular, apart from just age:

How you FEEL inside you; whether you still feel energetic, able to work, fired with enthusiasm and wish to continue; or you just feel tired, burnt out and ready to simply relax and enjoy yourself.
Whether you still love what you are doing and wish to continue it as long as possible.
Whether you would like to do something else with your life, perhaps fulfil a long time dream, and wish to make a start on it.
Whether you have enough money to see you through your retirement.
Whether you are fit and healthy, or have any chronic illnesses.

Only you can answer those personal questions, and the answers should clearly reveal whether you are ready for retirement or not! But, as you can see, age is a significant factor only if you are governed by an ageing mindset, as it is the least important of all the listed criteria!

If you found this useful, your donation is most appreciated and will make a HUGE difference to maintaining this website.

Personal Dilemmas #1: What would you do?

Posted on 05/08/2022 by mscyprah

This series tests the quality and skill of your interactions, at home and at work. It is an opportunity to honestly examine what you would do in such a hypothetical situation, and give a response from your particular perspective.

DILEMMA: Your date or partner is not keen on voting, does not believe in its effectiveness, and refuses to vote, because, in their words, “One vote doesn’t change anything.”

You take the opposite view, that one vote can make a difference, especially in marginal counts. You cite American Andrew Jackson in 1824 “who won the presidential popular vote, but lost by one vote in the House of Representatives to John Quincy Adams, after an Electoral College deadlock”. (Source: The Power of One Vote – Middleton, MA)

What would you do next?